Friday, April 11, 2008

Run 'til you Die



This is a picture of Ereck Plancher. He was a football player at the University of Central Florida. He died after collapsing during a conditioning drill on March 18th, but that is not even while the story begins. We have seen athletes like Korey Stringer and Rashidi Wheeler die during conditioning drills, but neither of them died like Ereck Plancher did.
The above link tells the story of how Plancher was obviously struggling during conditioning drills, yet his own coaches insulted and disparaged him as he was in the process of dying before their very eyes. Four of his teammates are on record of how UCF coach George O'Leary singled out Plancher for finishing last in various drills and berated his effort in front of the entire team. Later that evening Plancher died, and UCF and O'Leary had to go into damage control. He has denied the reports stated by his own players, the ones who were taking part in the same drills as Plancher and were running side by side to a dying man.
After the high-profile deaths of the aforementioned Wheeler and Stringer, there were many reports of how college and pro programs alike would be more aware and understanding of players who were showing signs of physical weakness or possible life-threatening symptoms. Unfortunately it doesn't seem like these advances made it down to Orlando. At UCF it appears the same old draconian and macho attitude that lead to the death of numerous athletes before Plancher was not only still being applied, but even worse was being forced upon the members of the football team. If it is true that O'Leary (the same guy who lied on his application while trying to become coach at Notre Dame) and the rest of his assistants basically turned a blind eye to a dying player, then something a lot more serious than a half-baked claim of institutional change needs to take place. I would sure believe the statement's of Plancher's teammates over that of legendary douchebag O'Leary, and therefore I believe that not only should O'Leary and his staff be immediately fired but he should also be charged criminally in the role of Plancher's death.
I find it inconcievable first of all that a coach and his staff wouldn't be able to tell the difference between lack of effort and much more serious symptoms that were being shown by Plancher. As his own teammates stated, he was obviously having trouble breathing, yet none of the coaches saw him struggling and then compounded this mistake by basically saying he was half-assing a workout, (make that a pointless workout in MARCH, not the actual football season). If this is true, it not only violates the stated responsibility of a coaching staff to not only coach and train its players, but also monitor their well-being and physical stability. These coaches are trusted with their players lives, and frankly it looks like the coaches of UCF care more about the results of a mat drill than the actual lives of one of their players.
So here we are, almost a month after Plancher died. He is in the grave, having died for a conditioning drill, while O'Leary and his staff are still getting paid to supposedly run a football program. If this doesn't seem fair to you either, then lets hope that someone else besides a random blogger like myself makes it a point to bring this issue up to someone who can actually do something not only to murderers like O'Leary and the rest of the UCF coaching staff, but also the entire NCAA that unfortunately seems to turn a blind eye toward the well being of the very players that make them such a powerful organization.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

58th Running of the Little 500


58th Indiana University Little 500

April 12, 2008

There's a lot to look forward to in the beginning of April. You have the Masters "Toonament", the start of baseball season, and the NCAA Men's Basketball championship. But there are few sporting events bring the excitement of the Indiana University Little 500 Bicycle race. The 58th running is shaping up to another exciting edition, with treacherous weather and an unorthodox start order the hot topics of discussion in the days leading up.

The favorites this year include a healthy mix of the usual GDI powerhouses and traditionally strong fraternities. Here is a look at the Young Contador's Power 10, with odds:

1. Black Key Bulls

BKB is led by this year's top rider, Isaac Neff. Neff and your's truly once came together as IU cycling teammates when we toyed with the field one Saturday afternoon at a Midwest Collegiate Cycling Conference road race. Our careers have gone in the complete opposite direction since that historic day: one crashing out the race and retiring a year later, the other winning ITT's and leading IU at Nationals. The '08 BKB squad is shaping up very similarly to the '06 DU team: one with three very strong riders supporting one alpha-male sprinter. If BKB's supporting cast can deliver Neff to the finish with less than 60 laps on his legs, they'll be the odds-on favorite to hoist the Borg Warner Trophy.
Odds: 3-1

2. Cutters

The defending champions will return the yellow jersey to the field, after the race went without a defending champ in '07 when ATO failed to qualify. They've lost star sprinter Alex Bishop to the domestic pro ranks, but Sasha Land will lead his band of stone cutting townies as an experienced three year veteran. It also doesn't hurt that he is about 28 years old. As always, they'll figure prominently into the overall race turnout.
Odds: 4-1

3. Phi Psi

Six time champion Phi Psi looks strong again and will be in the mix for a podium spot. Despite loosing two top riders from last year from their'06 campaign, the boys in red and green finally lived up to their potential, setting the pace and duking it out until the end and placed 2nd. Though they lack the depth and sprint power of the previous two years, they'll likely stick on the lead lap late into the afternoon, and with a little luck, have a very good chance of getting to the podium.
Odds: 4-1

4. Dodds House

"Dude-on-Dude" will come into the race playing the underdog role, as they're not as strong as in years past. That said, they'll still be disappointed with anything less than a podium finish. They'll be led by standout and future pro Mike Sherer, but can he can get the job done in crunch time? With usually reliable Dan Houchens' ability headed south with too much time in the library, it remains to be scene whether or not "The House" can deliver the knock-out punch necessary to close the deal. Bottom line: they'll be on the lead lap at the end.
Odds: 4.5-1

5. Delta Upsilon

The GDB pick to click and beloved favorite of Young Cicero, Por'que and Knuckleballer. After taking the Dixie Heighway award last year with a Herculean effort from their departed captain, the team is now led by triathlete star rider Dave Richardson-Rossbach and financial mastermind Kyle Murphy. Murphy (pictured at right) missed the '07 edition, instead opting to take a hiatus to train in the Swiss Alps with two-time world time trial champion Fabian Cancellara. He's back with a vengeance this year and has the legs to go the distance. Look for him to lead the team in face time. The group is rounded out by campus socialite and all-rounder Pete Stevens and sprint specialist Steve Tratar. As always, the boys from east 3rd will stay in it with the best exchanges of any team in the race.
Odds:6-1

6. Team Major Taylor:

Known more for the drama created by their divisive financier and coach, Courtney Bishop, TMT will again hope for a strong performance from Ali Camara, who will need to carry them. TMT began as an exclusively African-American group, but now boasts the most diverse team on the track with each rider hailing from a different heritage. Exchanges are always an issue for Camara – he looks like Steve Urkel when he tries to get on the bike. Fortunately one he gets up to speed, he rides like Stephan Urkelle. Nevertheless, their race tactics and coaching savvy are enough to put them in the hunt for a top 5 finish.
Odds: 8-1

7. Acacia:

AKAK is back – well, in the top 10 at least. After losing their top 2 riders to mono and medical school preparation, this three-time champion hopes to get the program back on track with a top ten finish. Look for Ahlberg and Mohammed to eat up lots of laps, and for the man they call "hot Carl" to sprint at the end.
Odds: 8-1

8. F1J1:

As a seven time champion, FIJI is certainly not lacking in tradition. What they are lacking however is the standout star sprinter they've had in recent years past. Despite a lacking a true track star, their mysterious training methods and infinite budget provide all the means necessary to be a top five contender. Though not really in the mix for the title, FIJI will have the biggest and loudest crowd, and probably a top 5 finish when all is said and done.
Odds: 9-1

9. Phi Delta Theta

PDT is back in the mix with a revived fraternity program that's making some noise. They're top rider placed second in ITT's and will have to carry them come race day. With only two riders with any experience, they'll be in the mix for a top 10, but likely out of the hunt for a podium spot.
Odds: 15-1

10. Sigma Alpha Mu

Sammies have been making some noise for a few years now and are beginning to gain the respect of the Little 5 community, especially when they took the pole position. That shouldn't suprise you too much though - Drew Kushnick took a pole head-on and lost in the '06 edition, when he collided with the traffic light on the inside of turn 1. If they can avoid the light poles in the turns, they should good to stick around for a top 10 finish.
Odds: 18-1.

*Very special thanks to Young Contador for this very special guest submission to GDB. See you on race day!

Seriously, go fuck yourself Brett Favre

I am at my breaking point with this guy. Over the years we've heard him glorified in the media on a level we've never seen before, despite plummeting production in the past decade. We've had to endure the ongoing saga of "will he or won't he retire" pretty much every off season. And of course last but not least, we've had to listen to announcers slurp up to Favre in every Packer game while forgetting they are actually there to announce a game, not talk about Favre for 3 hours.

So after he finally retired this spring, and the final accolades accumulated in honor of a hall of fame career, I was hopeful that was the last we heard of Favre. Reporters everywhere claimed that Favre was the type of guy "who would dissapear from public consciousness and rarely be heard of again." He was going home to Mississippi to ride his tractor and spend time with his family, and everyone was happy with that.

Unfortunately, and like so many other times in Favre's career, it seems like his retirement news conference was nothing more than a ploy for Favre to recieve the media attention he seems to so badly covet, despite constant reports to the contrary by Favre lovers like Peter King. It started last week when Sam Farmer of the LA Times reported that #4 had never officially signed retirement papers and that his agent was telling teams other than Green Bay that Favre may possibly be interested in playing for them this fall if their starter got injured. Favre vehemently denied the report, and claimed the same old excuses of how he has never been happier since his retirement decision. His name then went away for all of a week, before Brett decided to tell a reporter that he was thinking of coming back in the fall and thought he could still play in the NFL.

So where does that leave us with the most annoying quarterback ever to enter our consciousness? Well, pretty much the same place we've been with Favre every offseason over the last 5 years. Every offseason he says how he's thinking of retiring, then never really does and is glorified for returning for another year by his reporter lovers. What's so much different about this year, just the fact that he never formally retired but only recieved notoriety for holding a press conference. He also hasn't been practicing with the team, but then again he hasn't done that in the offseason the last 5 years either, being allowed to skip mandatory workouts because he needs personal time and because he is apparently a better family man than the other 65 players on the Packer roster. Finally, Favre is desperately trying to keep his name in the media and thus his ego satisfied by continuing to be cryptic with his decision to play this fall. I lambasted Terrelle Pryor for basically doing the same thing in his recruitment earlier this spring, but at least Pryor is a young 18 year old kid, Favre is doing the same thing at damn near 40 when he should have already learned something about humbleness and fairness.

It is so sickening that we are going to have to hear 3 more months of this bullshit. Every day some talking head is going to wonder whether Favre is really going to return, and Favre will happily eat up this speculation and string them all along because of his insatiable desire to remain relevant and popular in the social arena of sports. Think this story is annoying now, wait until mid-July when there's nothing else going on in sports and training camps are about to open, this shit will be played ad naseum to the point where the Terrell Owens and Roger Clemens coverage of years past will seem like a footnote on the ESPN bottom line.

I'll close this entry with a confession. When i was growing up i loved Brett Favre, pretty much because he seemed like the only guy with the sack to go up against the vaunted Dallas Cowboys, a team I've always hated. My good friend, Dan Paige, was a huge Dolphins fan and thus loved Dan Marino. We'd always argue about who was better and i would staunchly support Favre in any argument, even though Marino was the greatest quarterback alive. I haven't talked to my friend Dan in a long time, but if i could I'd let him know that I'd switched allegiances to his side in support of Marino. Favre may have his surpassed his records, and Favre may have a Super Bowl ring, but Favre is nowhere near the man Marino is. While many lamebrain's will remember Favre as some sort of deity, I'll see him as an ego-maniac who became so annoying late in his career that his playing greatness has been overshadowed by his selfish pride in the eyes of the common fan. So i'm imploring you to please just leave our lives Brett, and please realize that you can leave our public consciousness, but you will never leave the NFL record books. Isn't that good enough for you??

Knowshon hype is growing


While it may have taken the numbskulls at ESPN over a year to figure out who Knowshon is, them and the rest of the media are finally figuring out how good he is. Here is a solid piece from CNNSI about the top running back in America describing his path to becoming one of the greatest freshman running backs in NCAA history. And while the hyperbole being thrown about regarding UGA's 2008 football chances will probably get well out of hand by September, any praise sent 24's way is rightfully deserved

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Breaking News



KOMU-TV's Chris Gervino is reporting right now, live at 10:30P.M. CST that the younger brother of AP Player of the Year Tyler Hansbrough, Ben Hansbrough, has announced that he will transfer from Mississippi State University. Ben Hansbrough started 28 games for Miss. St. this year.

Gervino also announced that there were five schools Hansbrough is looking to transfer to: Missouri, Indiana, Purdue, and two others too inconsequential to name. Gervino then pointed out that Missouri has no more scholarships to give, so Psycho-B would have to come to Missouri as a walk-on. Ummm yeah. Right.

Let's hope that he makes the right choice and goes to Indiana. He will give a reeling Hoosiers program a second success in a row, as well as give new Coach Tom Crean something to hang on his cap before he even coaches a game. Although the younger Hansbrough isn't quite the player that his brother was this year, who knows what could happen in time? Plus he will sit out a year, so he can learn the game and study Big 10 opponents, all while physically preparing him for his time as a Hoosier. Instead of Psycho-B his nickname might become "White Marco Killingsworth." Or at least we can hope so.

Hansbrough

Banzai

The Dollar is Looking... Not So Strong

Here is a nice picture of the kind of seat you can expect at the Final Four for the mere price of $275:



What in the hell are you paying for here, the atmosphere? These people are paying $275 to look a Jumbotron of the game that is being played about 500 feet away from them at an angle that makes it vitrually impossible to see even IF you managed to get your hands on some binoculars. And there is little doubt that the feed is going to be delayed, so everytime you hear the place erupt, you have to be wondering "What the hell happened?" until 5 seconds later when you see it yourself and cheer (or boo) with your little section.

I'm sorry, but for $275 I would much rather go to Lawerence or Memphis and watch the game at a bar and get absolutely tanked with TRUE fans ($275 can go a long way at a college bar). That atmosphere would have to S-H-I-T on this (especially if you managed to pick the site of the winner). I guess it would be nice to tell the grandkids that you were in the vicinity of one of the best National Championship games in recent memory.

(Insert overused and gay "Witnessing, but not really seeing, Mario Chalmers game tying miracle 3 - Priceless Mastercard joke here)

Yahoo! Copycats!

It looks like the staff writers at Yahoo! are running out of their own original ideas for stories, so they have resorted to copying some of my finest work from GDB.

Tell me if these two stories, both appearing on www.yahoo.com within the last 24 hours, look familiar?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080408/us_nm/mexico_absolut_dc

&

http://sports.yahoo.com/olympics/news;_ylt=AtBxFL.BHJUB7P7gTmXF92LNycIF?slug=dw-olygamble040708&prov=yhoo&type=lgns


I guess myself and other GDB writers must remember that imitation is the highest form of flattery.

Most Clutch Ever?

ESPN had a poll today asking where Mario Chalmers "Hail Mary" 3 pointer to tie the game and send it into OT ranks all time amongst the most clutch shots in NCAA Tournament history. The choices were "Most Clutch Ever", "Top 3", "Top 5", etc. etc.

Naturally, Jayhawk nation had it being the most clutch ever. So that got me to thinking: where would I rank this as the most clutch shot in NCAA Tournament history? After a few minutes of thought, here are my choices:



#1.) 1987 - Indiana vs. Syracuse (NCAA Championship Game)

Probably not the shot everyone thought would be number 1, but in my opinion, this was the most clutch shot in NCAA Tournament history. Sure, there were similar amazing shots (and more famous ones, like the one below this) that have been made in the tournamment, but Keith Smart's jumper was drained in the National Championship game, the biggest stage, to put Indiana ahead by a point to win the title.



#2.) 1992 - Duke vs. Kentucky (East Regional Final)

This is arguably the most famous and known shot in, not only NCAA, but basketball history. 2.1 seconds left. Grant Hill to inbound (GUARD THE INBOUNDER!!), toss to Laettner, fakes right, turns and nails it. While this shot is far more famous than the Keith Smart jumper, I would argue that it isn't nearly as clutch as that shot. That game sent Duke into the Final Four where they would go on to win their second straight NCAA title. It is remembered because it was an amazing shot, but all it did was send them to the Final Four. No one remembers what happened after that, except that Duke won the National Championship. Had he missed the shot that would have sent Duke to the Final Four, it would not have seemed like as big of a miss as if Keith Smart had missed the shot to win Indiana the title.



#3.) 2007 - Kansas vs. Memphis(NCAA Championship Game)

I would rank this as the 3rd most clutch shot in NCAA Tournament history when you look at all the elements that went into the shot. It was the championship game. KU had stormed back, down by 9 points with 2 minutes left. Memphis could have put the game away, but couldn't hit their free throws. 3 seconds left. And he drains an off balanced 3 with a man right in his face to preserve the game and win it in overtime.

Monday, April 7, 2008

Memphis Final Preview


At the beginning of the NCAA Tournament, Memphis was supposed to be the first number 1 seed to be eliminated. In fact, the haters have been chirping all year that the Tigers are overrated. The only time they were the 1 seed was after they were the only undefeated team left in the country, and they promptly lost to Tennessee to lose the top spot. Still they finished the year with just one loss and all the momentum in the world. People said they couldn't make a long run in the Tourney because they weren't battle tested in a weak Conference USA. It only seems fitting that the team that no one believed in is now in the title game. John Calipari's band of merry men haven't really been truly threatened by any squad in March Madness so far. They plastered MSU and Texas by 19 points each before eliminating the Knuckler's predicted champ UCLA by 15 on Saturday. Tonight, they face a stacked Kansas roster ready for a battle, and you can bet Memphis is prepared to give them one. Let's take a gander at the Tigers five keys for victory.

1.) Circulating the game through Derrick Rose. The best player on the floor needs to be the center of attention this game. As long as he can control the flow of the game, the Tigers will be in great position to cut down the nets. Like Furry said, "Desert Rose" has straight dominated this Tourney. Not only has he stepped up his game, but the rest of the team realizes that in order to be successful, the Freshman phenom needs to touch the ball every possession. Whether he's tossing up a monster alley-up for Joey Dorsey, or creating an open mid-range jay off a screen, he's probably going to take over as long as the rock is in his hands.
2.) Chris Douglas-Roberts must penetrate the lane more than Peter North. When CDR gets a full head of steam, he's very difficult to stop. He doesn't have the all-around talent that Lebron possesses, but he can drive almost as well as the King. The Monster of the Motor city is one of the most explosive guards in all of college basketball and makes up the best backcourt tandem in all the land.
3.) Chalkin' it up from the Charity Stripe. The Tigers biggest crux heading into the tourney was their inability to cash in on the Free Throw line. That's why many so-called experts predicted an early demise in the tourney. Memphis has seen quite a reversal in fortune during Smarch Madness though, converting on nearly 80% of their Free Throw attempts. A big part of the success has hinged on the afformentioned CDR. Whenever he drives, there's a very strong chance that he'll either score or get fouled. In the NCAA tournament he has made 45 of his 54 FT opportunities. Including 9/11 against the Bruins. If he can put up a similar ratio in this contest, it could really make the difference down the stretch.
4.) Force the Jayhawks to become sloppy papi's. Not many teams in basketball turn the ball over as much as KU. Even with a convincing win over UNC, they still had 19 TO's. If Memphis can keep the aggressive defense at on high octane, the 'Hawk's are going to have more Turnover's than Marwan at the breakfast buffet. Kansas had better hope it's not 19 though, because a repeat of that stat could be a death blow to their title hopes. Look for the Tigers to pounce on the Jayhawks early and often tonight.
5.) Dominate the Paint. Joey "Deez Nuts" Dorsey has been putting his balls to the wall over the past couple of weeks on his way to shutting down the inside game of every opponent. K Love wasn't his usual self thanks to Dorsey dropping an epic deuce on his face. Joey is going to need to be even better against Kansas on both ends of the floor. Considering the 'Hawks height, Dorsey's average of 10 boards per game is no gimme. Sasha Kahn (artist) ate up the Heel's on Saturday and the battle will be on inside in this game to see who can get the upper hand.

Tyler Hansbrough

5 Important Factors for the Jayhawks Tonight


Saturday was a pretty good night for the Jayhawks. Not only did they win a huge game over UNC, but they also did it against ex-coach and legendary cryer Roy Williams. The icing on the cake is how they turned media darling Tyler Hansbrough into the next Mark Madsen. That game took so much energy out of KU that its going to be a challenge to match the emotional intensity even though tonight's game is for all the marbles. So what are 5 factors that are imperative for Kansas in tonight's game? Lets take a look
1. Stopping Derrick Rose. No player has been as dominant in this tournament as the Chicago-bred freshman. He's been the most athletic player in the tournament as well as the best all-around player in the entire field. Rose has torn up a who's who of point guards as well on the path to the final game including Jamont Gordon, Drew Neitzel, DJ Augustin and Darren Collison. Fortunately for Kansas, they have three awesome perimeter defenders who could possibly contain him. Russell Robinson, Supernintendo Chalmers and Sherron Collins made Tywon Lawson look like Greg Paulus and also shut down the scorching hot Stephen Curry in the Elite 8. They will have to be at their defensive best tonight against Rose, because he is better than anyone they have faced all year. A good sign for Kansas is that their three guards can either go big with Chalmers, play physical with Collins, or match up in speed with Robinson. Maybe the different looks will slow down Rose and get him off his game, because if he dominates like he has lately Memphis is going to be very tough to defeat.
2. Get shots for Brandon Rush. Memphis has played some of the best perimeter defense in the tournament. Where smaller players have withered against the lengthy Tiger defenders, Brandon Rush will have to use his size to get off good shots and provide the Jayhawks with a go-t0-guy on offense. Rush had a really good game against UNC despite his shot not falling, but he will have to both make his shot and penetrate tonight to keep the Memphis defenders honest. Rush has had a tendency to dissapear for long stretches of games, but he cannot do that tonight. Tonight is the reason why he returned to school, he must play like its his last game.
3. Find some inside production. Sasha Kaun and Darrell Arthur have had nice stretches during games, but they have not been consistent enough to get past a team like Memphis tonight. Kansas is going to need an inside presence to keep Joey Dorsey and Robert Dozier honest on defense. If Mother Russia and Arthur can establish inside play and get those guys in some foul trouble, then they will not be able to aggresively help on the penetration of the Jayhawks perimeter players.
4. Control Turnovers. Memphis has been feeding off of the turnovers of their opponents. There is simply no way to stop Derrick Rose and Chris Douglas-Roberts in the open court. And while Kansas has good ball handlers they have a tendency to get out of control. Their mistakes in the open court let UNC make the big comeback and they must be more careful with the ball tonight. The tempo is going to be fast and Memphis will be trying to poke the ball away from dribblers the entire night. If Collins and Robinson are playing out of control and giving the ball away to the Tigers, the Jayhawks might lose by 20.
5. Keep the game close. Kansas is the more veteran team and is battle-tested. If the game is close they get the decided advantage thanks to their ability to go to multiple options and because they are the better free throw shooting team. Its no coincidence that Memphis' only loss, to Tennessee, and their only close game in the tournament, to Mississippi State, occurred when an open-court game turned into a half-court game in the final minutes. While Rose can still create in those situations its much easier to shut down the Tigers because the big guys and Antonio Anderson will not look for their shots. Free throws will probably not be a huge deal because the ball will be in Rose and CDR's hands and they shoot it well, but Calipari is an awful coach in close games as exhibited in his coaching decisions down the stretch in the Tennessee game. While Bill Self is no John Wooden either, I think he's more prepared to keep his team under control and make the right play if its a close game than Calipari is. If its a 2 point game after the under 4 timeout, Kansas will be right where they want to be.

MLB Opening Week observations

What a crazy first week in baseball. Scrub teams everywhere are blowing up while some of the top teams are off to a pathetic start. Lets recap and see some of the trends that emerged in week 1.

- It looks like the Tigers have put 2002 in the time machine and stepped right back to patheticness. All the hitters are pressing, the pitching has been dubious and there does not appear to be any relief ahead. The Tigers next 4 series are against the Red Sox, their nemesis the White Sox and two against the dangerous Blue Jays. 0-6 is bad enough, but when combined with the division and league they play in, another 2 bad weeks could prove fatal.

- The Sawks and Yanks are looking very ordinary. The Sawks catch a break i guess because of their awful scheduling, but that starting pitching doesnt look nearly as good as last year. The Yankees just look old, with fossils like Mike Mussina and Andy Pettitte looking completely washed up.

- Young Cicero must have been doing a lot of dick sucking in the last week, because his Cardinals are outrageous right now. Props goes to Dave Duncan for turning around a staff full of bum pitchers. Who knows how long they can keep it up, but the good fans of St. Louis will hopefully get a few months to root for this team while they are in contention.

- Johnny Cueto is illa dilla. His biggest problem is that his new manager is Dusty Baker, who turned the equally ill Mark Prior into a big pile of worthless within three seasons. If Cueto's arm survives his manager's destructive tendencies, he could be the next Pedro.

- Congratulations to the scheduler who made the Tigers and Cubs play at home early in the season, while the Rays and Rangers opened on the road. I guess this numbskull didn't realize that its still cold in the great lakes in the first week of April. Maybe he's drinking a little too much of that Al Gore Global Warming Kool-Aid.

- As a frustrated fantasy manager who owns Felix Hernandez, I'm excited by his first 2 starts but am also ready to gut the entire Seattle blowpen for costing him 2 victories by letting the scrub-ass Orioles come back in the 9th.

- Whoever thought it was a good idea to give Barry Zito 126 million dollars should be deported.

- I didnt think it was possible, but Steve Phillips seems like even more of a pedophile now that the rest of the Baseball Tonight slobs are referring to him as "Silver"

- If Ben Sheets is healthy, the Brew Crew could win 100 games. Eric Gagne needs to be sent out to pasture though, what a legendary HGH has-been.

- 4 days until the first Yanks-Sawks game of the season, which means 4 days until I jump off a cliff.

- Every Cubs fan that thinks its funny to say "Fuck you do me" in honor of Kosuke Fukudome is not only woefully unfunny, but is also a perfect example of the type of douchebag fans that have overtaken Wrigley Field to the point that its legendary crowds are now vastly overrated and unliked.